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Then others, like me, generally believe it's just a bad idea, and no matter your number, you are going to still look less than pure-- especially to the man of your dreams if you've manged to find him.

If the number is higher than zero, I think sometimes for a lot of men the ones who are interested in something real , it's just too hard a pill to swallow.

Let's face it. I've had male friends admit that, especially for women they think highly of or want to be "the one," although deep down they know someone has probably put down footprints on her path What I do believe can and should be discussed with any potential partner is sexual health history Vox Magazine offers good advice on how to broach the topic.

But actual number of partners? Yeah, yeah, I'm all about women's liberation. We make more money, we're more independent and educated and we have the right to sleep with however many people we want as long as we are responsible and no one should trip, right?

All things being equal, sure that makes sense. But in the real world, if you're a woman and have bedded "too many" men, both women and men will agree that you, my dear, are still considered a hoe.

So how many is too many? Well that's for each individual person to decide. But I did get put on to an interesting theory about "the number" from a man.

I like to call it the "casual encounters to relationship to age of sexual debut ratio" patent pending on the name. Based on some scenarios my male friend offered up, I've created a game for y'all.

If she was faithful during the relationships, the 2 partners who weren't considered boyfriends probably punched her freedom card in those periods between committed relationships, or she may have gotten one casual in before her first relationship.

Of the eight total years of her getting her swerve on, six of those years were in a faithful situation. I was told in that scenario, that number was not bad at all and that most men could probably take that on the chin and move on happily with that woman.

But, I was also told, if you are 18, started having sex at 18 and you have 5 partners before your 19th birthday Now, things happen.

And I was told there may be an asterisk by your number in certain situations depending on your faithfulness, too. My male friend put this doosey on me.

I needed a calculator with sine and cosine functions to figure this one out Oh boy. According to the math, you either: A. If you answered B, I'm willing to give you some leniency.

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It's an unspoken rule. If you're dating someone and especially if you have sex with that person, he or she should spend the night.

Or at least I thought it was an unspoken rule. But now I'm not so sure. Apparently, some people are just "weird.

He may invest lots of time with her, spending hours talking, going out on dates, just kicking it--but he's not going to sleep over.

That doesn't mean that the woman can't stay over at his house , however. That's fine. He's just not comfortable sleeping at anyone else's house.

I didn't know these strange people existed. So I recently surveyed a friend and two close relatives--all women. I asked them, is it just me, or is it a big problem if a man you're dating won't sleep over--especially if you're having sex?

Frequently Asked Questions. Be sure to bookmark the page and print the information on the option s that applies best to your situation.

You will want to refer to this information when speaking with your mortgage company. Gather the information shown below.

Use the Financial Checklist to help get organized and prepared. Contact your mortgage company and ask them about the options that are available for your specific situation.

Use the Contact Log to keep track of your conversations and follow-up items. Make sure you are ready to discuss everything about your current situation—the more the mortgage company understands and the more accurate the information, the more they can help you find the right option.

Ask them to confirm your current situation to be certain there are no other issues. Make sure you understand the next steps involved and if there is anything you will need to complete for the specific option.

Making Home Affordable offers help to borrowers who are struggling to keep their loans current or who are already behind on their mortgage payments.

By providing mortgage servicers with financial incentives to modify existing first mortgages, the Treasury hopes to help as many as 3 to 4 million homeowners avoid foreclosure regardless of who owns or services the mortgage.

Do I need to be behind on my mortgage payments to be eligible for a Home Affordable Modification? Responsible borrowers who are struggling to remain current on their mortgage payments are eligible if they are at risk of imminent default, for example, because their mortgage payment has recently increased to a level that is not affordable.

If you have had or anticipate a significant increase in your mortgage payment or you have had a significant reduction in income or have experienced some other hardship that makes you unable to pay your mortgage, contact your servicer.

You will be required to document your income and expenses and provide evidence of the hardship or change in your circumstances.

Yes, but only the first mortgage is eligible for a modification. How do I know if my servicer is participating? Are all servicers required to participate?

Servicer participation in the program is voluntary. However, the government is offering substantial incentives to servicers and investors, and it is expected that most major servicers will participate.

If the modified interest rate is below the market rate, the modified rate will be fixed for a minimum of five years as specified in your modification agreement.

Beginning in year six, the rate may increase no more than one percentage point per year until it reaches the rate cap indicated in your modification agreement.

The cap is equal to the prevailing market interest rate on the date the modification is finalized as published by Freddie Mac based on a survey of its customers.

This cap means that your rate can never be higher than the market rate on the day your loan was modified. If the modified rate is at or above the prevailing market rate, as defined above, the modified rate will be fixed for the life of the loan.

The modification payment will include a monthly amount to be set aside escrowed to pay taxes and insurance when they become due.

This escrow is required even if your prior loan did not include an escrow. Borrowers who are unable to make three payments by the end of the trial period are not eligible for a Home Affordable Modification.

However, you may be eligible for other foreclosure prevention options offered by your servicer.

Borrowers who are behind on payments or at risk of imminent default often do not have cash to pay for the expenses of a loan modification.

Borrowers who qualify for a Home Affordable Modification will never be required to pay a modification fee or pay past due late fees. If there are costs associated with the modification, such as payment of back taxes, your servicer will give you the option of adding them to the amount you owe on your mortgage or paying some or all of the expenses in advance.

Paying these expenses in advance will reduce your new monthly payment and save interest costs over the life of your loan. If you would like assistance from a HUD-approved housing counseling agency or are referred to a counselor as a condition of the modification, you will not be charged a counseling fee.

Borrowers should beware of any organization that attempts to charge an upfront fee for housing counseling or modification of a delinquent loan, or any organization that claims to guarantee success.

Borrowers, especially delinquent borrowers, are strongly encouraged to contact a HUD-approved housing counselor to help them understand all of their financial options and to create a workable budget plan.

These services are free. However, housing counseling is only required for borrowers whose total monthly debts are very high in relation their incomes.

It is voluntary for other applicants. When you apply for a Home Affordable Modification, your servicer will analyze your monthly debts, including the amount you will owe on the new mortgage payment after it is modified, as well as payments on a second mortgage, car loans, credit cards or child support.

I heard the government was providing a financial incentive to borrowers. Is that true? Borrowers who make timely payments on their modified loans will receive success incentives.

For every month you make a payment on time, Treasury will pay an incentive that reduces the principal balance on your loan. This contribution by the Treasury will help you build equity faster.

Is this mortgage eligible for a Home Affordable Modification? For example, if you own a house that you use as a vacation home or that you rent out to tenants, the mortgage on that house is not eligible.

If you used to live in the home but you moved out, the mortgage is not eligible. Only the mortgage on your primary residence is eligible. The mortgage servicer will check to see if the dwelling is your primary residence.

Misrepresenting your occupancy in order to qualify for this program is a violation of Federal law and may have serious consequences.

I have a mortgage on a duplex. I live in one unit and rent the other. Will I still be eligible? Mortgages on two, three and four unit properties are eligible as long as you live in one unit as your primary residence.

I owe more than my house is worth. Will a Home Affordable Modification reduce what I owe? The primary objective of the Making Home Affordable Program is to help borrowers avoid foreclosure by modifying troubled loans to achieve a payment the borrower can afford.

Investors may, but are not required to, offer principal reductions. It is more likely that your servicer will use interest rate reductions in order to make your payment affordable.

I have an FHA loan. Can it be modified under the making Home Affordable Program? Are all loans eligible? Most conventional loans including prime, subprime and adjustable loans, loans owned by Fannie Mae , Freddie Mac and private lenders and most loans in mortgage backed securities are eligible for a Home Affordable Modification.

Currently loans insured or guaranteed by these agencies are being modified under other programs that also enable borrowers to retain homeownership.

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Labels: guest blog , Nina Lovehall , period , sex. Labels: free stuff , men , women. Some people believe you should tell the real number and get it out there and be honest with every person you encounter intimately.

Other folks feel like it's worth telling only those you are serious with. Then others, like me, generally believe it's just a bad idea, and no matter your number, you are going to still look less than pure-- especially to the man of your dreams if you've manged to find him.

If the number is higher than zero, I think sometimes for a lot of men the ones who are interested in something real , it's just too hard a pill to swallow.

Let's face it. I've had male friends admit that, especially for women they think highly of or want to be "the one," although deep down they know someone has probably put down footprints on her path What I do believe can and should be discussed with any potential partner is sexual health history Vox Magazine offers good advice on how to broach the topic.

But actual number of partners? Yeah, yeah, I'm all about women's liberation. We make more money, we're more independent and educated and we have the right to sleep with however many people we want as long as we are responsible and no one should trip, right?

All things being equal, sure that makes sense. But in the real world, if you're a woman and have bedded "too many" men, both women and men will agree that you, my dear, are still considered a hoe.

So how many is too many? Well that's for each individual person to decide. But I did get put on to an interesting theory about "the number" from a man.

I like to call it the "casual encounters to relationship to age of sexual debut ratio" patent pending on the name.

Based on some scenarios my male friend offered up, I've created a game for y'all. If she was faithful during the relationships, the 2 partners who weren't considered boyfriends probably punched her freedom card in those periods between committed relationships, or she may have gotten one casual in before her first relationship.

Of the eight total years of her getting her swerve on, six of those years were in a faithful situation. I was told in that scenario, that number was not bad at all and that most men could probably take that on the chin and move on happily with that woman.

But, I was also told, if you are 18, started having sex at 18 and you have 5 partners before your 19th birthday Now, things happen.

And I was told there may be an asterisk by your number in certain situations depending on your faithfulness, too.

My male friend put this doosey on me. I needed a calculator with sine and cosine functions to figure this one out Oh boy.

According to the math, you either: A. I heard the government was providing a financial incentive to borrowers. Is that true?

Borrowers who make timely payments on their modified loans will receive success incentives. For every month you make a payment on time, Treasury will pay an incentive that reduces the principal balance on your loan.

This contribution by the Treasury will help you build equity faster. Is this mortgage eligible for a Home Affordable Modification?

For example, if you own a house that you use as a vacation home or that you rent out to tenants, the mortgage on that house is not eligible.

If you used to live in the home but you moved out, the mortgage is not eligible. Only the mortgage on your primary residence is eligible. The mortgage servicer will check to see if the dwelling is your primary residence.

Misrepresenting your occupancy in order to qualify for this program is a violation of Federal law and may have serious consequences. I have a mortgage on a duplex.

I live in one unit and rent the other. Will I still be eligible? Mortgages on two, three and four unit properties are eligible as long as you live in one unit as your primary residence.

I owe more than my house is worth. Will a Home Affordable Modification reduce what I owe? The primary objective of the Making Home Affordable Program is to help borrowers avoid foreclosure by modifying troubled loans to achieve a payment the borrower can afford.

Investors may, but are not required to, offer principal reductions. It is more likely that your servicer will use interest rate reductions in order to make your payment affordable.

I have an FHA loan. Can it be modified under the making Home Affordable Program? Are all loans eligible? Most conventional loans including prime, subprime and adjustable loans, loans owned by Fannie Mae , Freddie Mac and private lenders and most loans in mortgage backed securities are eligible for a Home Affordable Modification.

Currently loans insured or guaranteed by these agencies are being modified under other programs that also enable borrowers to retain homeownership. If you meet the general eligibility criteria for the program, you should gather the financial documentation that your servicer will need to determine if you qualify.

Once you have this information, you should call your mortgage servicer and ask to be considered for a Home Affordable Modification. The number is on your monthly mortgage bill or coupon book.

If your loan is current, please be patient as it may take some time before servicers are able to process all applications.

However, servicers immediately can begin reviewing the eligibility of borrowers. If you would like to speak to a housing counselor you can call HOPE HUD-approved housing counselors can help you evaluate your income and expenses and understand your options.

This counseling is FREE. If you have already missed one or more mortgage payments and have not yet spoken to your servicer call them immediately.

How long will the Home Affordable Modification Program be available? The program expires on December 31, Your trial modification must be in place by that date.

My loan is scheduled for foreclosure soon. What should I do? Many servicers have made a commitment to postpone foreclosure sales on all mortgages that meet the minimum eligibility criteria for a Home Affordable Modification until those loans can be fully evaluated.

However, borrowers whose loans have been scheduled for foreclosure or any borrower that has missed one or more mortgage payments and has not yet spoken to their servicer should contact the servicer immediately.

Is that the same as my lender or investor? Your loan servicer is the financial institution that collects your monthly mortgage payments and has responsibility for the management and accounting of your loan.

Your servicer may also be your lender, which means they own your loan, however, many loans are owned by groups of investors.

They held the loans, earning the interest as borrowers repaid over time. Banks were thus limited in the number of loans they could make because they had to wait to make new ones until savings deposits grew or existing borrowers repaid their loans.

Many families who wanted to own a home were unable to do so because there was not a steady supply of money to lend.

Over time, banks started to turn loans into cash by pooling large groups of loans together to create mortgage backed securities that could be sold to investors such as pension funds and hedge funds.

The investors get the right to collect future payments and the bank gets cash that it can use to make more loans. Investors hire loan servicers to collect payments and interact with customers.

If you have questions about your loan or you are behind on your payments you should call your loan servicer at the number on your payment coupon or monthly mortgage statement.

Why does my loan servicer have to ask the investor if they can do a loan modification? If the organization that services your loan does not own it, your servicer may need to get permission from the owner or investor before they can change any of the terms of your loan.

Generally, there is a contract between the servicer and the investor that states what kind of actions the servicer is allowed to take. Most of these contracts, called pooling and servicing agreements PSAs , give the servicer a lot of leeway to make modification decisions, so long as the modification provides a better financial outcome for the investor than not modifying the loan.

What should I do if my servicer tells me that the investor is not participating in Making Home Affordable?

Borrowers should check first to see if their servicer is listed. If so, you should call your servicer back and ask to speak to a supervisor or you may contact a HUD-approved housing counselor for assistance.

If your servicer or investor is not participating in the program, you should ask your servicer or a housing counselor about other workout options that may be available.

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